I don't want to hide any of the sexism of Sherlock, I just think that mixed in with the misogyny and sexism of Belgravia is a whole pile of fascinating thoughts on gender and identity, and that's more than Bohemia gave us. The scene where John and Irene talk about how they're both in some fashion in love with Sherlock, but neither is attracted to him, almost saves all the show's no-homo jokes in Season 1. The Christmas scene ends with Sherlock humiliating Molly, but before that we see this amazing found family of Sherlock, John, Mrs. Hudson, and Molly sharing what is genuinely and recognizably a domestic, family moment. And Irene calling herself "The Woman" instead of it being the condescending name Sherlock applies to her is a fascinating and thought-provoking reversal.

And then there's a whole mountain of fail. And then there's the end of the episode. So I don't know, I don't blame you for rejecting it completely, but I do think there is a lot there worth trying to salvage, and I get frustrated when people compare it unfavorably to Bohemia.