Or at least chop the Fairyland section way down. That, to me, was where the story really started to lose momentum -- especially because it wasn't payoff for anything set up before; it was a new element being thrown in without warning.
Personally, I'd favor a more radical restructuring: have Snow get to the duke's castle soon after her escape (likely by having her hitch a ride with the dude whose son got killed -- seriously, they telegraphed in every way "he's going to meet her outside the castle walls on his horse!" and then didn't do it), and then rearrange the other material in the context of Snow trying to rally support. It would make her and the other good guys a lot more proactive; as it stood, the bulk of the film consisted of them running away from the bad guys, who were the ones actually driving the plot.
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regna
(no subject)
Date: 2012-06-13 20:40 (UTC)Personally, I'd favor a more radical restructuring: have Snow get to the duke's castle soon after her escape (likely by having her hitch a ride with the dude whose son got killed -- seriously, they telegraphed in every way "he's going to meet her outside the castle walls on his horse!" and then didn't do it), and then rearrange the other material in the context of Snow trying to rally support. It would make her and the other good guys a lot more proactive; as it stood, the bulk of the film consisted of them running away from the bad guys, who were the ones actually driving the plot.